your resistance brings you pain
July 20th, 2012
Received by: Child of God
You ask for advice and I will give it to you at this time. You should go and talk to J. This will give you an opportunity to see him as the friend he is to you now. He still loves you. Not in the way he used to love you, but as a friend. He is there for you and that is the truth.
You must respect his desire for privacy and not ask questions about things that now belong to his private life. He will let you know when he feels ready for that. But you can talk to him about your problems and you will know that he can help you and that he wants to. He hasn’t changed with respect to this heartfelt and loyal aspect.
You still feel a lot of love for each other and it will not disappear. You must find a way of showing it to each other. It will be good for both of you to be friends and to honestly seek this new relationship. This will take time, but this first conversation might be the first step for both of you to see what may come in the future. It will take some effort from both of you and maybe even more on your part since you are a wounded soul these days.
There is nothing wrong with you. Everything you experience at this time is part of your growing, a part of your letting go. You are resisting these changes out of fear for what might come. Your resistance brings you pain and makes your heart feel heavy. You fear for the future and resist letting go of the past.
I will assure you, you need not fear. Your future is bright and you will experience much love and happiness. But you must let go. Having this conversation with J. will help you with that. You will know that you still have all the best from your relationship and you should let him be your friend and at the same time do not expect that you can be his friend in the way that you think. For you to become his friend takes time and he needs to figure out his own life first. He needs to be your friend first and experience that he can help you and that you will let him live his own life. You must show him that you want the best for him and that you are able to let him be your friend even though he is in love with another woman.
This is the beginning of a new period in your relationship. It takes some courage from both of you to take this next step. But you should do it. You will soon both experience the value of it.
With much love